I Acknowledge and Accept
by mavis-in-sweaters
Summary: "He was fading. The world was already just a haze of colours that didn't matter, people who were ghostlike. There was only Percy Jackson, kneeling over him, a haphazard picture of agony and beauty. "I love you," Nico finally whispered to him, and his eyes closed, his heart stopped, the failed beginnings of a finally peaceful smile lingering on his lips." Nico's death.


**PLEASE READ THIS**

**Alright. So this is basically my worst nightmare about what will happen in The Blood of Olympus. I am strongly against the notion of Nico dying, not only because he is an incredibly deep and important character, but because I feel so personally connected to him.**

**Listen, the LGBT community doesn't have great representation in the media, and when it does, it's either pretty laughable, or the characters 1. fall in love with a hot straight character, or 2. die.**

**I hate this. I hate how people think of Dumbledore as proper representation, when it was announced _after _the books, and really wasn't representation at all. Ever so insulting afterthought? **

**I hate the taboo put around Gay, or simply not 'Straight' characters. I desperately want Nico to survive, maybe even find a love interest who will love him back. I feel like I can finally connect to a character because of my sexuality, and finally feel like I'm not such a taboo after all. If Nico becomes a character who survives the battle, and finds love, then I will be Rick Riordan's biggest admirer. It would mean so much to me.****  
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**Anyway, I hope you enjoy this fic. It's basically canon, so involves Nico loving Percy, but Percy only loving him as a friend or sibling. Everything belongs to Rick Riordan, except my actual writing, of course.**

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><p><strong>I Acknowledge and Accept<strong>

The awful thing was, Nico had known.

He knew that Percy wouldn't, and couldn't die. If there were any logic left in the world, then it would make sense that Percy would be spared, because he was what the world needed. A selfless, unassuming mortal with unimaginable loyalty and unfathomable bravery. He was a _necessity._

Of course, Annabeth couldn't die either. She was practically Percy's counterpart. The world was not yet cruel enough to take her. The Gods would spare her from what was to come.

There was a reason for each of the seven. A reason to live. Some had loved ones they had to hold on to. Some were too great, too beautiful, too _needed._

Nico had long ago acknowledged the fact that they couldn't all live. They were the protectors of the earth, and therefore, couldn't always protect them selves. The second fact that Nico had acknowledged was that it was going to be him. He had run through all the possible variables in his head, and every story ended with him being the sacrifice. The sacrifice for a better world.

Sometimes, in his imaginations, it was a pure fluke, and he had simply let his guard down for a second too long, to be cut down by enemies. Inside, however, he knew that it would be Percy. Reckless, vulnerable Percy. Even before it happened, he could practically see the fatal blow meant for the son of Poseidon striking him down instead.

Nico didn't exactly want to die, but if he were meant to, then he wouldn't mind dying for Percy. Percy would never know how Nico really felt, but he would kneel over Nico's body and weep, and the battle would go on, and the Earth wouldn't stop.

Nico knew he wasn't that important, really.

Leo had always thought _he_ was the seventh wheel, the odd one out who served no more purpose than the maintenance man, and the ship entertainment. He didn't know just how much acceptance he got, while Nico sulked away in the shadows. It wasn't like anyone trusted him. Hell, he didn't even deserve _Percy's_ trust, not after he had betrayed it so carelessly before.

He would die, and everyone would keep on living. It was as simple as that.

All of this flashed through Nico's head momentarily, as time seemed to slow down. It was almost peaceful. The silver blade that no one saw but him, it's landing course set for the small of Percy's back. Nico didn't hesitate.

His sword had been knocked from his hands not minutes before, and Percy wouldn't have time to move, should Nico call out. So he flung himself in front of the blade, fear in his ears and acceptance eating away at his stomach. Because deep down, is anyone ever ready to die?

Annabeth had done this, so long ago, to save Percy's life. Nico wanted to laugh at the irony of it all. Percy would die to save those he loved, but the one who loved him would be the one dying today.

The knife tore through skin, sliding through bone and skin, and Nico welcomed it. The knife meant no more longing from afar, no more regret.

He didn't die right away, so he cried out, and the sound tore itself, raging and cruel, from his throat. Percy turned around as he crumpled, to see the effect of his inattentiveness. Riptide ripped apart the perpetrator in Percy's helpless fury.

"No… no, no, Nico!" he screamed, and in those last few moments of conscious thought, Nico could only help but wonder if Percy really meant it, if he actually cared.

"Nico, I'll save you… I'll… you just have to hold on," Percy cried, tears already starting to fall, because he knew too. He knew that Nico would be the one to die today. "_Please _Nico, you have to stay with me!"

Nico smiled brokenly, spasms of pain racking his body, his fingers scrabbling clumsily to feel the blood pooling out of his chest. How could there be so much blood for someone already so dead inside?

His father might let him see Bianca, and she would open her arm to welcome him. He would finally be at peace with his feelings for Percy, and he wouldn't hurt any more.

But now, with Percy's grief so strong, and his wretchedness so great, Nico couldn't help but cry too, because he knew where Percy would be going; Elysium. Nico would surely wander through the Fields of Asphodel for the rest of time, and Percy would just be a trace of a memory. Never seeing Percy again was a curse worse than any fate imaginable.

He was fading. The world was already just a haze of colours that didn't matter, people who were ghostlike. There was only Percy Jackson, kneeling over him, a haphazard picture of agony and beauty.

"I love you," Nico finally whispered to him, and his eyes closed, his heart stopped, the failed beginnings of a finally peaceful smile lingering on his lips. The reality is; death comes quick, and sometimes goodbyes aren't an option.

Percy screamed. He screamed in pain, and sorrow, and frustration, because why would the world be so cruel as to take Nico? He screamed at the injustice at whatever force decided that the best people meet the worst fate.

He tried to save him. He pressed his hands against Nico's chest, healing water searching for life in the corpse, but finding nothing. He tried to restart the heart that had loved someone unattainable, but the world had been sure in her decision. A small, terrified boy in love would be the sacrifice, and the boy himself had acknowledged and accepted that.

Nico didn't live to know whether Percy had understood his final confession, he didn't live to see how the others suffered because of his death. He closed his eyes in that world, and opened them in another world, where his sister stood to meet him. Bianca smiled, and Nico, his shoulders finally unburdened, accepted it.

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><p><strong>My worst nightmare. Right there.<strong>

**Thank you for reading. **


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